Gary’s Fitness Blog

We all need athletic “blinders” … most of the time.

This morning Nikki and I got into an argument during our run. It centered around a workout that I had given the Chicago Marathon group that we were in the middle of completing. I was trying to get a message of “experience” across, while she was trying to get the point of “perfection” across.

In the end, we both had reason to feel frustrated. But the workout ended great and another life lesson was learned while taking part in this endurance lead life.

Upon thinking about this mornings run, I have continued to think about this idea of training with an emphasis on perfection. I am actually in favor of training for perfection, but only within the right mindset. For example, training with a focus on perfect experience and not perfect outcome.

This may seem like an argument in semantics, but I don’t think so. I’ll share more on this subject when time allows, but here’s a quick thought:

Perfect Experience vs. Perfect Outcome

I find that when I become more devoted to challenging an aspect of my own physiology or mindset I obtain a higher satisfaction out of my endurance lifestyle, versus the times that I become focused on obtaining some external outcome (i.e. Boston Qualifying, top 3 age group, etc.). The irony is that I often perform my best when I am able to completely detach myself from those external influences (times, paces) and allow my body/mind to focus on self-perfection in my performance.

This is a fine line (as in today’s workout) when a workout or race is governed by specific external factors. It is difficult but it can be done.

Creating our athletic blinders.

Elaine Breeden is a swimmer at Stanford University that just qualified for the USA Olympic Team in the 100 and 200 fly. Back when Elaine was a swimmer for the Wildcat Aquatics program, I had the opportunity to work with her for a short period of time in one/one and team settings.

At that time there was also some interest in sharing ideas with her about how to prepare mentally for competition, I wrote my “Mental Training for Athletes” article as a response to thoughts that I wrote out to share with her. As time passed, I continued to see personality traits in her (at 14) that I felt were an essential part of her success. I wrote some of those thoughts in a blog post titled, “Personality of a Champion“.

After Elaine qualified for the Olympic Team she was quoted in the paper and interviewed on tv, which lead me to send her some questions regarding her mental preparation. I feel that one thing she said in her reply, really addresses this topic of “perfect experience” vs. “perfect outcome”.

Here is that specific question and answer:

Me: I am really interested in some things that they quoted you saying in the Lexington Herald and in your interview, specifically: “I had my eyes shut and was focused on my stroke” interview after the 200.

Elaine: Closing my eyes is more of a natural reflex while racing than something I plan on doing. Its my way of putting “blinders” on so I think about my stroke, not the rest of the heat.

Most of us do not understand what it means to compete at such an elite level - I don’t. But I can only assume that the temptation to feel motivated or driven by an outcome is significantly greater at that level of performance than any level I have competed in. Especially when your competition is ultimately determined by finishing first or second (and not some personal best).

Elaine’s response is the reminder that I sometimes need. I need to focus on my experience and ultimately the performance will be there and the outcomes will take care of themselves. This is another characteristic of a champion, they understand what they can and can not control - then they perfect what they have the power to manage. In fact, earlier in her response she wrote:

“My focus going into trials was to stay confident and positive and to concentrate on the things I had control of. “

It appears that she is much better at implementing some of the mental training and preparation ideas that I shared with her than I am myself. Not surprising to me. As I have said many times since meeting her, she is very talented physically, but there is something about her personality and character that sets her apart (and she is only 19!).

Elaine has shared some more thoughts with me and I have a few more questions to ask her, but I’m going to wait until she gets back from China.

Seek the perfect experience. Control what you can. Find the blinders you need … and allow the outcome to occur!

The Flying Pig was my second marathon in 8 days, as I ran the Country Music Marathon the Saturday before. I have been asked a lot of questions about why I would want to do this, especially because of the training I was doing prior to these runs (i.e. lack of specific marathon training).
I want to answer some of those questions, but I would like to address those in a separate post. I’ll title it; Things I learned by running two marathons in 8 days: And how these lessons can help you. (I’ll write that post soon and come back here and link to it.)

Right now, I want to focus on the Flying Pig Marathon itself. The course, the race organization, how I ran and how much I enjoyed it.

The basic statistics for my run are here: Flying Pig Marathon Stats

The Flying Pig Marathon Course:

There is no doubt that the marathon course is not the easiest course that I’ve run. I ran the marathon back in 2003 and remember it being challenging. This past weekend it did not disappoint. The one change since the last time I ran it was that the Kentucky loop was at the very beginning of the race, opposed to being at the end. This is a welcomed change because running over the bridges at the beginning on fresh legs was much easier than I remember running them on tired and weary legs towards the finish. Even though they weren’t demanding on my legs, they posed a challenge for me to keep my heart rate down where I wanted it - so I had to incorporate a lot of self-restraint during that section.

As you run back into Ohio, the course doesn’t get forgiving. The hills keep coming in a continuous pattern, and once you get to mile six, you have a pretty steady uphill run for approximately 2 miles. This early into the run, it is essential to not get too excited (or discouraged) by the hill. It’s way too early to spend all your extra energy.

Looking at the elevation chart they have of the course, you would think that after the half way point, you would be gradually running downhill the rest of the race. While there are not as many climbs as the first half, the second half still has it’s challenges and is by no means a flat or fast finish.

The two things that I really love about this course is the scenery. Having just run the Country Music Marathon, I can make a pretty decent comparison to it (and similarly to the Rock N Roll in Arizona), and personally I think the Flying Pig is the most scenic and appealing course of the group. The other great thing about the course was the crowd support. If you listen to the podcast, I will mention a couple spots during the course where it just feels like miles that people are stretched out on both sides of the run. I don’t remember getting too lonely at any particular time during the run (opposed to the Derby Festival Marathon), even though a few periods were more sparse than others.

Overall, I have to rank the marathon as difficult to run, but worth the work. (Hard to believe that my marathon PR is still on this course?).

Oh yeah - I forgot to mention - They have the best swag of any marathon by far. They gave out towels, medals, posters, t-shirts (all typical) but they also gave out a very nice Flying Pig duffle bag. This is something they’ve given out both years I’ve run it.

How I ran the race:

I was very happy with how the race turned out, especially considering how I went into the race. The hard thing for me to accept at times is not being on top-of-my-game. What I mean by this is that I am not so competitive with myself that I can’t run a race to have fun and just enjoy the event; but when I have a day like Sunday, I have a lot of - “if I only did x” - thoughts.

There will be a lot of discussion about strategy, training and all the other performance variables in a marathon program in the “lessons I learned” post. But there is one thing that I’d like to highlight here, which will be worthy of repeating many times:

A walk - run strategy is a very effective methodology and race strategy for most runners doing a marathon, and essential (in my opinion) for first time marathoners.

I realize that this is a concept that I have talked a lot about in the past (like.. here, here, here), but it is so useful that it is worth discussing on a regular basis.  Because it is useful doesn’t mean it is an easy methodology to implement; in fact I have found it is the most difficult teaching lesson for 85% of the runners that ask me for help.  They often feel defeated when they resort to a run/walk pattern, they are sometimes told they are not “true runners” (kid you not!).

That is the great thing about this journey of endurance.  We get to learn about our bodies and what they can do physically, our minds and what it can handle, our egos and what it controls and our spirits and where they will take us.

My run walk strategy for the Flying Pig was pretty simple - walk 20 seconds at every aid station.  This was changed early into the marathon because I was having a difficult time managing my heart rate (ego) and pushed that 20 second walk to 30 seconds.  There were times early on that I felt like the aid stations were very close together and was walking too often, but I stuck to the program I decided on prior to the race.

Towards the end of the race, I moved back to a 20 second walk and skipped the final aid station around mile 25 (was shooting for 3:20 at this point).

It was a very satisfying experience.  To put myself in a race that I’ve done before, in a condition that wouldn’t allow me to have a personal best, and then be able to mediate all the negative thinking, push my ego to the back seat while I tried to develop a better understanding of how my mind interacts with my body, to take the time and enjoy the crowd, to view the scenery - and then for a few miles - allow my body to experience pain.

It was a great experience.  I have often wondered what I will do when I get to an age that it becomes unlikely that I will be able to set new personal records or race longer races - Will I continue to race?

After this weekend, I think I can say yes.  And while that answer will come one day, I have found the better (and more self-rewarding) competitions are between my ego, body, mind and spirit.  Not with a training partner or a clock.

Taking that lesson into all of my races will be a challenge, I am sure.

I am about half way through a book titled “Beyond Booked Solid” by Michael Port. The book is a business read, but I just read through a section that seemed to apply very well to an athlete’s attempt at a new fitness goal (Remember - Brad says we are all athletes!).

In the chapter, Projects - How to Get Things Done, Port goes through a list of “simple rules to get things done.” Of course the rules are designed to address a business project, but isn’t taking on a half marathon, marathon or a triathlon a project? A project on yourself!

Think of all the management skills you have to use when you begin this journey of endurance: scheduling workouts, relationship building, family management, coordinating outsourced help (from coach, trainer, nutritionist, physical therapist, etc)… it really is a project.

Reading through the list of rules that Port shares, the one that really made me think about this connection was the last rule - “Have a Compelling Story for Your Project.” Let me share a couple quick quotes from that section:

“Keeping your passion and your focus depends on telling and retelling the story of your project” … “[your story] will become increasingly important as you face problems, setbacks, or any type of project breakdown”

Discussing some research by Dan McAdam’s, author of The Redemptive Self: Stories Americans Live By, Port talks about the value of our story to our behaviors:

“.. when we tell our life stories, we are really just telling ourselves who we are and why. McAdams found, for example that successful people often tell a life story characterized by overcoming adversity, connections with others, and a belief in the future. In fact, the narrative themes we choose when we tell our life story may well be diriving factors in our behavior.”

The Direct Application to the Journey of Endurance:

Some of the stories that I’ve heard over the years are pretty amazing.  When I think about the people that give me motivation to continue my own journey, it is because they have had a compelling story.  Here are a couple stories:

- Gordo Byrn - now he is a professional triathlete, finished top five at Ironman multiple times and has a performance lab in his basement in Boulder, Colorado.  But that hasn’t always been the truth, nor was it the story that inspired me to call him my hero in triathlon.  At the age of 30, Gordo was a beginner, just like most of us - with a full time job, etc, etc.  He used to talk often of his process to “come off the couch” and become the professional athlete.  This story is actually the force that compelled a masters swimmer to tell me about him back in 2001, and while the professional Gordo is interesting, the couch to athlete story is motivating.

- Brad (right here at sweat365) -  The title of his blog is pretty revealing, “Fat Kid becomes Ironman.”  Over the past year, I’ve had the ability to read and share in Brad’s story because he has been open to us readers through his blog.  It is a story that many people probably relate to, especially when they decide to take on this endurance project.

There are many more stories that I’ve heard at races, on blogs and lately on podcasts (steverunner, zentriathlon and confessionsofarunner), but one thing to think about when figuring out your own story is this:

Take control of your story.  Define your own path.  Don’t be afraid to dream (and become) big. Be positive.

I have written about the benefit of positive “story telling” in a post I titled:  Talk Yourself into a Better Triathlon Performance.  It was about the thoughts I had after reading Bobby McGee’s book, “Magical Running,” integrated with some ideas that I shared about - Mental Training for Endurance Athletes.

One of the more personal stories that I’ve shared related to self-image and running was a story I shared a couple years ago, Define Yourself (and Be Positive).  The point was of sharing that story is that we will have face our doubters.  We’ll have people telling us we can’t do that because we are not good enough, fast enough, strong enough, healthy enough or anything-not-like-them-enough.

It might be that we’ll have more people telling us that we can’t than telling us we can.  I even had a guy continually telling me I was “running too fast” - “was going to bonk” - “wasn’t going to finish” while running my first marathon.  (Jerk!)

But that’s the secret.  Develop your story.  Define who you are, what you want to accomplish and then share it.  The platform here at sweat365 gives you that ability.  And then sell that story to every person you see.

Micheal Port says in his book, “Never discount the power of the stories you tell about your projects.  Stories articulate why a project is important to everyone involved, and they keep the project on track.”

I’d love to hear your story.  If you’ve already constructed your story - Please share it by posting a link in the comments of this post.  We can all improve by reading other compelling stories.

The long run is usually viewed as the center piece of a marathon training program. In the current pop running culture, this means that most marathon training programs work towards the “20 miler”.

This is a topic that I have discussed many times in the past, with many different people, and I thought now was the time to get all my ideas out there to share with fellow runners.

Why I don’t like the “20 mile” Destination for marathon training:

1. I don’t like the concept of placing so much importance on a single 20 mile run. Why? In many running programs that I see, runners end up putting so much value on the long run that it ends up taking away from the value and training stimulus they could get by having a solid week of running. (Which means running regularly throughout the week too.)

This doesn’t mean that every runner using these programs puts too much emphasis on the long run, but psychologically it can become a trap. If you decide that the weekend long run is the most important workout of the week, it can be tempting when “life happens” to justify missing a couple runs during the week, as long as you “accomplished” the long run.

This is a trap that often leads to, in the worst case - injury, in the best case - less developed fitness due to less overall training stimulus.

This idea becomes even more magnified if a training program leads towards the 20 miler and a runner develops the belief that they are ready to run the marathon, using the 20 miler accomplishment as their only indicator.

I’m not the only one who takes this approach. Jack Daniels, in his book, Daniels’ Running Formula suggests that the longest run you do be under 2.5 hours. The risk-to-reward ratio (injury risk/physiological reward) beyond that point is often not worth it. I remember Bobby McGee taking a similar stance.

Solution: as a runner begins a marathon training program, set the initial goal to accomplish “x” number of weeks running 3 days and building to 5 days a week before taking on any run over 2 hours. “x” depends on your timeframe, but a typical 18 or 20 week program should give you at least 6 weeks to build up to 4 runs at 40mins+ or 5 runs at 30mins+.

2. Does it pass the common sense test to do more than 50% of your running in one day? It doesn’t, but many marathon runners that I see or read about do just that.

When a runner is doing less than 40 miles per week, that is what they are doing when they build to a 20 mile long run.

Again in Daniel’s book he suggests that the long run be no more than 25% of your total weekly mileage. Therefore to have a long run of 20 miles, a runner must be doing a minimum of 80 miles a week. That kind of mileage is not all that common for the average age-grouper hoping to finish a marathon.

An approach that I have reviewed several times that I like a lot (probably because it is how I like to train people too) is the way the the Hansons train their runners (their age-groupers, not their elite… that would destroy all of us).

In their approach, the longest run that a beginner or advanced runner does is 16 miles. (I know your are screaming in revolt as you just read that.) The advanced runner will see more training stimulus throughout the program, but the longest run distances are the same.

What a refreshing display of understanding an average runners needs and ability. Someday I would love to get some closer looks and discussions with the Hanson-Brooks guys, but from the outside looking in, I like what I see.

Solution:

So you are freaking out about not running longer than 16 miles prior to your marathon day - that’s normal. But it is normal due to the fact that the 20 miler has become ingrained into every running groups mindset around this country, not because there is a physiological or training stimulus significance to that distance.

I personally don’t have a 16 mile limit in many of the programs I help with, I schedule the longest run at 2.5 hours and allow a little more if the runner is running well, consistent and injury free.

So how do we address the psychology behind “being ready”?

The Double Long Run Weekends.

I have to admit this is not my idea originally. It was a style of training that a professor I had at UNL (Nebraska-Lincoln) put me through (in late 2000) when I went to her for a solution to my 2 previous failed attempts at running a quality marathon.

The basic Idea: is to alternate weekends, doing a longer run on week one, then two medium long runs on Saturday / Sunday of week two. Then repeat that pattern throughout your training program. An example might look like this:

week 1 - Saturday: 12 miles / rest
week 2 - Saturday: 8 miles / Sunday: 8 miles
week 3 - Saturday: 14 miles / rest
week 4 - Saturday: 10 miles / Sunday: 10 miles

That is a basic example, it would be changed based upon athlete, scheduling, along with other variables that could impact the schedule, such as races. I personally prefer to use time goals than mileage goals, but the same pattern would apply with either method.

What I found was that this pattern allowed me to be incredibly more consistent in my running. I would spend less time recovering from the mega long runs. I also found I could easily handle more total running stimulus in a week compared to situations when I was trying to stay fresh for the weekend long run.

Those two things improved my running greatly - consistency and greater overall training stimulus.

How to approach the Double Long Weekend?

These weekends can be tough sometimes, but they can also provide a great deal of training stimulus and self-confidence. Here are some tips that I like to share about those weekends:

1. Saturday’s run should be relaxed and comfortable. I rarely get excited about how fast or slow the runs are, because the main goal is to feel strong. Many times the Saturday run will be finished with the runner feeling a little anxious about not having done enough. Especially when they have reached a point where 10 mile runs could be done each day they run.

2. Make sure you allow your legs to recover after Saturday’s run. Proper post run nutrition, stretching, cold baths are all good ideas.

3. Sunday’s run should be done at an intensity slightly higher than Saturday’s run (but much less than the Tuesday,Thursday runs during the week.) Ideally, the runs would be completed at a pace that is 45 seconds to 1:15 per mile slower than the goal marathon pace.

This depends upon the runner’s current fitness though! Don’t run those times if they are picked out of the air, know that your fitness is prepared for them.*

4. Make the back half of the Sunday run the most intense of all the weekends efforts. Often this will happen naturally as the legs fatigue, but a very fit runner may need to push that portion of the run in order get the training effort up. (Still should be around 45 seconds off marathon pace.)

Using these double long runs in this manner, especially approaching the Sunday run this way should give the runner confidence in their ability to run the marathon’s 26.2 mile distance. It can also be a huge learning experience to feel the legs achy and tired prior to Sunday’s run and still being able to finish the distance or duration.

As mentioned, this structure also allows recovery to occur faster and decreases the risk of injury when compared to the single long run days.

Expanding this concept (even to triathlon).

This idea can be taken one step further for the more advanced runner. An example that I can share is my approach to our (Nikki and my) run programs leading up to Ironman Wisconsin last September.

Knowing that putting in a long run didn’t fit the schedule or our ability to maintain regular workouts in the other sports, we built up to a “broken marathon”. This was different for the two of us as we were different in our running needs.

My program built to this series: 12.6 am run / 6.8 pm run (included some tempo) / 6.4 am run. That got me to 25.8 miles with a little tempo built into it within a 30 hour period.

Nikki’s program built to this series: day 1: 10miles, day 2: 10miles, day 3: 6miles. That got her to 26 miles within a 48ish hour time period as the day one run was an evening run and the day 3 run was a morning run.

Keep in mind that this isn’t a prescription to copy, just an example as to how the idea of stacking runs in a 24/36/48 hour time period could be done. This method was easy enough on my body that I was able to get in an hour recovery swim during the evening of the second day.

(As a sidenote, the longest run I did in the Ironman build was 15 miles.)

Final Thoughts on Approaching your Long Run.

The long run is an important piece to any marathon program, but don’t be fooled into the dogma that the long run has to follow the staircase to 20 miles. It might just be the worst thing you could do for your training, because training and racing become difficult if not impossible when you are nursing an injury.

Try a double long weekend… you just might see your running improve like I did.

* This deserves another post that I hope to get to soon, but for now you can read Daniels’ Running Formula or search google for “VDot running”.

The picture above is from this past weekend. The weekend was a good reminder as to what balance can create for your health, sometimes fitness, but may not be a positive factor for performance. Read On.

This past weekend Nikki and I spent Saturday afternoon through Sunday afternoon at the Boone Creek Anglers Club. It was a short retreat with the other trainers and families from Fitness Plus (the studio we personal train at). It was a great way to spend some time socializing, relaxing, hiking and just being around nature. We often take little trips outdoors in order to get away. Thankfully, we live in Kentucky where there is a lot of natural beauty to be explored. (Even though people say that we should still be living out west if that is what we truly desired… take a look for yourself. Pictures here.)

The whole experience allowed me to solidify some thoughts that I have been having on what type of year I would like to have in triathlon, running and competing.

The process of an active lifestyle:

Last year around the New Year, I wrote a post discussing the benefits of setting up process goals. It sounds easy, but often we fall into the outcome based thinking. As I approached Ironman Wisconsin in September, I felt that pressure to become more and more outcome focused. Some of that pressure was from others always asking what my goals were, some of the pressure was within in my own mind deciding what would be and what would not be successful.

I feel like I succeeded in fighting off those pressures and just allowing my training plan take care of itself and allowing the race to happen. (You can read my race report if you want.) The interesting thing for me was what happened after the Ironman. I quickly became dissatisfied with my accomplishment and found myself looking for how I could “better” my efforts this year. And by better, I mean, how can I prove myself to others and myself again.

By November, I was making plans to do two and possibly three ironman distance races in 2008. And my training plan was beginning to be sketched out. But that is not what I want to be about. I can’t force myself to be happy only by beating “x” or even out-doing myself. Triathlon, running and all the activities that I’ve competed in over the last 9 years has been about a lifestyle.

I find it interesting that on January 1st, 1999, I sat down and wrote down on a piece of paper

“complete a marathon”

And nine years later, I fully anticipated completing a couple marathons and iron-distance triathlons in the same year. There could be a lot said about the change in lifestyle that has occurred during that time!

This year I have decided to revive my commitment to the lifestyle, the daily process of being active. I’m not 100% sure what that means right at this moment, other than it means I will seek balance in my activities and I won’t target an A race.

Why? Well my thinking is this; when I have an A race chosen each day is geared towards one single day of the year. This reality alone makes it difficult at time to chose activities that will increase my enjoyment, because the activity chosen is the one that will prepare me to do that race better.

I will still race, but hopefully no race will become more important than another. Nor will any race become more important than my Saturday rides. There might be a lot of peace available for myself if that is true.

The bottom line is that I’m taking the “Basic Week” idea to a lifestyle extreme of having a noncompetitive anticipation as my end. The reality is that is where it all began 9 years ago. As an 11 hour Ironman athlete, that is really where it is anyway!

Balance and Athletic Success:

My perspective of this as a coach is that this is not an optimal strategy that results in the best possible race. When it comes to health and fitness there is a level of balance that we all can achieve; when it comes to race performance, there is often little room for balance. The best athletes are those with a life that has little balance involved in it. If you have any questions about this, watch the documentary “What it takes“.

I received the documentary (along with the trainer version and Showdown) for Christmas. It is a very inspiring and interesting video, but you don’t see much balance available for those at the top end of the sport. They live swimming, biking and running.

Many of you are probably saying, “yeah but”. Yeah but, I don’t want to be the best. Yeah but, I’m an age-grouper not a professional. Yeah but, etc….

The truth is that at the long end of the tail, there is not much balance - even for the “everyman”. I personally will not be a top professional in Hawaii, I know that. But even when I compete against myself, I realize that to become a much faster Ironman than 11 hours, I’m going to have to sacrifice a level of balance.

In 2008 I will likely not become a faster Ironman athlete, but I will be very active. That’s the point.

– the picture is just a reminder of what truly makes me happy–

On September 9th I accomplished a goal that I’ve had since around 1999/2000 (I can’t remember the exact date that I put it down on paper but somewhere around then). I finished an Ironman Triathlon. I swam 2.4 miles, I biked 112 miles and I ran 26.2 miles all in 11 hours and 12 minutes.

What a great accomplishment and milestone in my life! But the question that I’ve been dealing with for the past week and a half is this; If accomplishing a goal like that meant so much to me, after sacrificing so many hours of my life, after sacrificing financial rewards and stability, after involving so many friends and family in my circle of support - why do I feel so empty?

If you read my analysis of the race results you will see that even then I was having a little difficulty enjoying what had just happened. Enjoying the moment.

I don’t want everyone to think that I’m walking around all depressed and feeling sorry for myself, that’s not true. But I do have this inner feeling that makes me feel like I should have enjoyed the finish a little more than I did.

Possibly the fact that I’m not really satisfied is a good thing, from a performance perspective. The dissatisfaction might be a strong motivator for me to train this winter and race more in 2008. That personality characteristic just might be an ingredient that exists in the personality profile of champion athletes.

I don’t have clear answers to these ideas, I have a lot more questions. Here’s a big one; If I’m not as happy as I want to be right now, What will give me a “10″ on the happiness meter?

A book that I’ve been reading has put some light on this subject, Stumbling on Happiness. The book isn’t a self help manual or workbook that leads you to happiness, so if you need help finding happiness, this is not a whole lot of help. But the author (Daniel Gilbert) does go through all the issues that humans face when trying to find happiness. The following are some interesting ideas that I’ve pulled from book that have helped me put my Ironman experience in context. Maybe they’ll help you understand your little journey too:

1. We commonly do things now so that our future selves will be happy. But how well do we know our future selves? How well do we know what will make us happy in the future? — We all think we know exactly will make us happy in the future. We are almost always wrong. — So even if I won an Ironman, would that give me a 10. What are you chasing to be happy?

2. When people day dream they see themselves succeeding rather than fumbling or failing. — This makes sense, why would you want to day dream about failure? The issue that I see becoming a problem is that when we day dream we rarily inject any reality into those dreams. Or, we may not set forth a plan that would help those day dreams become a reality. — How many Ironman goals are just day dreams that are not based upon any signal / sign of real events. i.e. my cycling times at Wisconisn. — I had a major problem seperating day dreaming in high school in relation to basketball. Unfortunatley a lot of day dreaming occured during games! I had troubles seperating out the thoughts of the crowd (girls) and actually competing. Good thing I’ve matured?

3. Fear and anxiety can prove to be a powerful motivator.

4. “When we imagine the future, we often misimagine the future events whose emotional consequence we are attempting to weigh.” Therefore when we actually experience that future event we maybe in a position of dissappointment. — I think this is a big reason why people always look toward the future in general and feel like it will be better than today (unless there is serious depression), the ability to find happiness is to realize the “now”. Today can make us happy. We can become fulfilled today.

5. “Researchers have discovered that when people find it easy to imagine an event they overestimate the likelihood that it will actually occur….. we tend to overestimate the likelihood that good events will actually happen to us, which leads us to be unrealistically optimistic about our futures.” — Yikes!

To finish my notes from this book for now I’ll share a quote the author shared from Blaise Pascal (philosopher and mathematician):

“All men seek happiness. This is without exception. Whatever different means they employ, they all tend to this end. The cause of some going to war, and of others avoiding it, is the same desire in both, attended with different views. The will never takes the least step but to this object. This is the motive of every action of every man, even those who hang themselves.”

Will winning an Ironman make me happy? Probably not. Not if I can’t find a way to be happy with where I’m at right now as a triathlete. I may say that it would make me happy, but remember, we are all pretty poor at determining what will make us happy in the future. It isn’t always better tomorrow, so start living today.

Spend some time in prayer, meditate for 10 minutes, tell someone you love them and mean it, go have the most passionate sex you can, spend some time helping someone … those things are not goals, you can’t “accomplish” them - but you can do them today. You can be happy.

So here it is - race week, 6 days before I participate in my first actual Ironman race (done the distance without the label) and I’ve spent a good amount of the last 4 days in the hidden corners of my mind asking myself - “Why do I want to be an Ironman?”

I’m thankful that I haven’t had to analyze this question before now because there is a possiblity that I couldn’t come up with a good answer, therefore making the daily training even more difficult. But the process of training is over, I have put in 451 hours and 50 minutes of training in 2007 to get to this point. At times I’ve felt cursed with this desire to know “why” about everything or to find an underlying meaning for every action. After reading the new biography on Einstein, I wonder how difficult it was for him to never find a “unified theory”. Imagine having such an intimate knowledge of this universe, only to come to a point in life where there doesn’t appear to be a simplistic methodology for understanding it. I guess that is a curse some people bare, the curse to find meaning and an inability to just let things be what they are. With that perspective in mind, here you go:

As I have thought about this, the interesting thing for me is that from the beginning (1999) to now, there has been a gradual transformation in the reasoning for why I wanted to participate in endurance activities.

The Beginning - I wanted an opportunity to say F-You to those who said I couldn’t.

I have written before about my experiences trying to play high school football in Nebraska. Even though when I sat down on January 1st, 1999 and wrote down my goals for this new adventure I didn’t put, “Show that A-hole you are better than he thought” I know that it was still there somewhere. I actually wrote down some glorified mumbo jumbo like, “use this experience as a platform to help others succeed.” I’m not sure what that really means, which is why there hasn’t been very many people that have benefited from my marathon running, triathlon races, adventure races or long distance cycling rides but me… to this point.

Why Ironman? Interesting enough, I’m not sure why I decided to make Ironman a goal. When I started I didn’t know how to swim and I didn’t own a road bike. There are two possibilities here: One - while attending the University of Nebraska I started to meet people involved with triathlon and Ironman was “the ultimate” in triathlon according to most people I talked to. Two - While running my first marathon I ended up running with a guy from Iowa. Not sure who he was, but he seemed helpful, at first. After a little discussion he started a long list of negative aspects about my marathon attempt. In a period of 5 miles he said, “You are going to Bonk” at least 20 times. He was incredibly negative about what I was doing and went on and on about how he was just using the marathon to “practice” as he was preparing for Ironman Florida. He was right, I did bonk and had a miserable last 10 miles. Maybe because I hadn’t trained enough (likely) or possibly because that guy convienced me that I wasn’t prepared. Either way, that jerk stole my joy. He took my happiness and accomplishment and trivalized what I had done (or was doing).

The “I’m gonna get you sucka” stage.

Once I got into a pattern of racing I fell into a phase that had me constantly comparing myself at races to others, specifically others that I felt I “had” to beat. Why did I have to beat them? Ego.

Eric Atnip says something quite a bit that helps put this into pespective. He commonly says, “I don’t get paid to do this.” How true. This doesn’t mean that being competitive is wrong or evil, but it does allow one to review where their competitive motivation comes from. Is it from a place that wants to crush the other guy because you want to “humble” them and boost your own “self-worth” or is it an opportunity to push each other to new peaks in performance or capabilities.

One thing that I’ve gained by living in Lexington, Kentucky is an environment that is filled with supportive competition. The culture of support among the endurance athletes in this town is tremendous. It is supportive and positive, something that I didn’t experience when I was entering into the sport while in college. (Not to say there wasn’t support in Lincoln or that everyone loves each other in Lexington, but my experience in the two environments couldn’t be more different.)

A lot of lessons can be learned by how some of the professionals act when winning and losing. Chris McDonald taught me a great lesson by his actions at Ironman Louisville on August 26th.

I’m glad that about 90% of that mentality has been removed from my concious and racing. Races would be incredibly unfulilling if that is where I was left today.

Where does my motivation come from today?

If I could narrow it down to a single word it might be - fulfillment. Or maybe a word like, empowering, living, satisfaction, humility….

If I could put it down in simple statements it might be any one of the following:

• - to pursue excellence in a singular area
• - to create discipline within a complicated mind in a crazy world
• - to remember that life is lived in moments of now, not recollections of times past
• - to instill a thankfullness to my God that allows me such a wonderful gift
• - to develop a trust in something other than my own mind
• - to understand pain
• - to disallow physical pain’s grip upon my conciousness
• - to disallow phychological pain’s manifestation on my body
• - to help carry some of the burdens that others’ spirits hold (Specifically for Ironman Wisconsin I will be thinking about the burdens that God has placed upon my aunt Connie and John Reier.)
• - to remember the blessings that I get on a daily basis
• - to honor those that have had a part in my development
• - to have an excuse so that I don’t drink too much once again…
• - to run from problems that seem to have no answer … because there will be an answer once those feet hit the pavement. There always is.
• - to understand the value of working hard

I realize that all of this may seem a little hokie for those reading this. “How can you get all that out of running a damn race?” I agree that it may seem overstated, I could have developed and matured from the person I was in 1999 to the person I am now without ever having run a single mile. But I didn’t! There are two tools that God has given me to deal with the demons I face and improving myself as a person - poetry and physical endurance. I’m not so open to sharing my poetry anymore, so you get to look into the window of my life through my racing.

If you want to read about someone else’s journey that just finished at Ironman Louisville, I suggest you go read Courtney’s Race Report. Sometimes a race means more than just what happens on a single day. Think about the lasting impression John “Blazeman” Blais will have upon the concious of those in the war on ALS.

Sure, there will be moments this Sunday where I will be motivated by images of me walking up to certain individuals and saying “F–K You!” But thankfully, I have a list of things that now motivate me than just that.

Checking out until next week. Follow Nikki and I at www.ironmanlive.com. Nikki’s race number is 2031, my race number is 437. There also will be text updates at various times at, www.twitter.com/ditschfitness